Save Gwendolyn, the cow strokerEdit
Eager to prove his worth with the Companions, S'oggy Balls talks to Vilkas to receive the next mission. Vilkas tells him that a citizen of Whiterun has been kidnapped and it is up to S'oggy to go save her.
Before he takes off to complete his assignment, S'oggy goes over to sweet talk Aela. Skjor, who is sitting next to her, asks if S'oggy needs help with anything to which S'oggy requests that he help take off Aela's clothes. Aela, seemingly not bothered by this, comments that she would offer S'oggy work if he wasn't already assigned a mission from Vilkas.
So S'oggy sets out on a mission to save Gwendolyn, who was kidnapped by bandits based in Silent Moons Camp. Gwendolyn works at Battle Born Farm and according to S'oggy, she belongs there stroking a cow's udders. Upon entering the Silent Moons Camp, S'oggy hears mooing, which may perhaps be the sound of a cow's udder being stroked.
Soon enough, S'oggy finds Gwendolyn walking around and he immediately comments on how unattractive she is due to her massive forehead. After fully abusing her looks, he takes Gwendolyn back to Whiterun to show her off to Aela in hopes of making her jealous. The voice in his head suggests S'oggy jump onto the table because all humans like cats that jump onto things. S'oggy does this but does not seem to win over Aela. Frustrated, S'oggy demands that she get jealous.
After an utter failure at making Aela jealous, S'oggy sends Gwendalyn back home to her farm just outside the gates of Whiterun. He expects he will receive milk as a reward for his trouble but all he gets is a thanks.
what the f*ck?
Gwen, why you have to play me that way"
S'oggy turns into a Cat-DogEdit
After calling Vilkas a scummy pervert, S'oggy excitedly approaches Aela to finally receive work from her. S'oggy calls her "honey baby pie tasty lips" to which Aela calmly praises him that he's "still eager to please" and that "this is good." Ultimately, Aela directs S'oggy to talk to Skjor.
Skjor asks S'oggy to meet him at the underforge, which S'oggy assumes that it's some kind of underwear. S'oggy tries to have thoughtful conversation with Skjor but S'oggy does not listen to Skjor's answer, as he is distracted by Aela walking in the background. S'oggy chases after Aela who oddly disappears into a rock.
S'oggy goes back to converse with Skjor and tries to make small conversation about eider cheese but as soon as S'oggy lifts up the cheese wheel, Skjor warns S'oggy to be "careful with that." Seeing how Skjor was not in the mood to talk and Vilkas breathing over his neck, he decides to sleep until nighttime to go to the underforge.
Nighttime arrives and S'oggy heads at once to the underforge, Skjor asks if he's "prepared?" Upon entering, S'oggy sees a beast standing in the back of the little cave. Skjor says that this is Aela in werewolf form. S'oggy is happy that he gets to see Aela in beast form naked. Skjor then offers S'oggy the power to become a werewolf. S'oggy contemplates about this since he is already harry from being a cat-person but takes up the offer in the end. Skjor takes out his knife, walks over to Aela, and cuts Aela to fill a bowl of blood. S'oggy drinks the blood and 30 sec later, soggy is running around attacking Whiterun guards. He then blacks out wakes up in the woods outside the town.
Aela tells him that his transformation was difficult and that they are going to kill the Silver Hands. So S'oggy charges in to kill the Silver Hands, an organization dedicated to destroy werewolfs. However, Aela does not join him in the fight. S'oggy is very disappointed about this. Heading deep into the dungeon, S'oggy finds Skjor dead. S'oggy, as per Elsweyr tradition, strip the fallen of their clothes.
S'oggy goes to report Aela and the rest of the Companions that Skjor has died in battle. Aela was angry, Farkas talked about how Skjor would compare his strength to Ysgramor's, Kodlak was morning the loss and Ria comments on how she "can only imagine Aela's anger." With the last comment, S'oggy speculates Skjor was dating with Aela? Now that Skjor is gone, Aela is free.
Back in the leaving quarters of the Companions, two dead bodies lie on the floor. They were the ones S'oggy killed when S'oggy made his is first step in Jorrvaskr, Companions headquarters. After uncontrollably turning into a werewolf, he realizes why the fighters were brought to the living quarters. It was for a little snack.
- No pun is ever intended.
- "What does it mean to be a companion? I'm feeling thoughtful."
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