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A Pimp Goes to College

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"A Pimp Goes to College" is the fourteenth episode in the Skyrim for Pimps series and the first episode of Season 2. This episode begins the "very special kind of walkthrough" for the College of Winterhold quest-line in The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim.

PlotEdit

We meet Crotch Guzzler standing on a bridge in the Skyrim wilderness. We then go over Crotch's Family Tree to learn more about his family history. At age 230, Crotch's parents have kicked him out of the house and he's on his own for the first time. He had been getting in trouble causing pranks (like pushing a wheelbarrow full of his own poop into town), and now he's ready to get serious and go to college.
Guzzler family tree

Lots of problems with this family tree...

He arrives in the city of Winterhold to join College of Winterhold and is met by Faralda guarding the entrance to the college. He tells her that he just wants to fuck people up with ice and fire, and this is why he's joining the college. Crotch passes the entry test she gives him, which makes him officially a student. Crotch comments on the fact that he only choose go to College of Winterhold because they were the only college that sent him something in the mail. Emre adds that College of Winterhold would be the equivalent of the DeVry College of Magic in the real world.

Mirabelle Ervine shows Crotch to his new room, and then instructs him on where he can attend his first class. There, he finds Tolfdir teaching an introductory course. After playing with a skull and not paying attention, Crotch mingles with his other classmates. He meets the Nord Onmund and the Khajiit J'zargo, also known as The Cat-man and the Faggot.

Skyrim For Pimps - A Pimp Goes to College (S2E01) College of Winterhold Walkthrough-111:23

Skyrim For Pimps - A Pimp Goes to College (S2E01) College of Winterhold Walkthrough-1

Crotch then heads out on his first field trip to the ancient Nordic ruin Saarthal. He doesn't seem to excited about a horny old teacher-man leading students down into a cave, but he finds the magical artifacts that he is supposed to. When he picks up a certain amulet and becomes locked in a cage. After becoming high on gas fumes, he trips out with a vision from a member of Psijic Order.

Crotch and Tolfdir kill some draugr and then proceed further into Saarthal. After solving a puzzle, they find a huge boring glowing ball. They are then attacked by a draugr named Jyrik Gauldurson, who probably sells cars. Upon defeating Jyrik, Tolfdir instructs Crotch to return to the college to tell the Dean about the discovery.

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