|DON'T ATTACK THE CHICKENS|
|Season 1, Episode 1|
|Air date||December 14, 2011|
|Written by||Adam Koralik, Aaron Yonda, Emre Cihangir|
|Directed by||Adam Koralik, Aaron Yonda, Emre Cihangir|
|"-"||"Quest For The Demon Horse Shadowmere"|
"DON'T ATTACK THE CHICKENS", is the pilot episode of the Skyrim For Pimps series and the first episode of Season 1. This episode also has a second name mentioned during the episode's intro: "Dope Overview". It is centered around Cock Nibbler, who is sidelined by Fün Tits for the rest of the season.
In the first scene of the series, Aaron and Emre witness their horse falling down a mountain. Emre tells Aaron that the horse sounds are the reason that you buy Skyrim, but the reason you keep Skyrim is for all the other stuff in it. Continuing with the rest of the video, we see Cock Nibbler being created in Skyrim's character creator. This is accompanied by hilarious comparisons of the races of Skyrim to characters or items in pop culture. When Skyrim actually begins, we witness the dragon Goat Nibbler (originally Alduin) attacking the town of Helgen. Some of the citizens were certainly more affected by this event than others.
Cock Nibbler is assumed to escape Helgen, as he greets us, with no armor to speak of, killing chickens and starting a town brawl. The citizens of Skyrim consider the killing of a chicken a vary series offense. Cock Nibbler is then shown outside of Whiterun defeating the second dragon he encounters, Filth Nibbler. This is done in his flame retardant underwear as well. After failing to raise the defeated Filth Nibbler as a zombie, Cock raising a moose zombie instead. Cock Nibbler is disappointed to learn that the moose zombie was unable to engage in combat at all.
After a loading screen that definitely wasn't long (at all), we are introduced to two sporting activities: a rawr-off and bowling with giants. A rawr-off is essentially taunting a giant and having it taunt you back to display dominance. This is usually followed by bowling with giants, which consists of being hit into the air with their massive clubs. There is not much of an object to bowling with giants, but giants are able to achieve great height with their swings.