"Drag 'N Rend" is the 114th episode in the Skyrim for Pimps series and the 25th episode of Season 6.
Plot[]
In the previous episode, Cock Nibbler discovers his ability to fly and travels high in the sky. Eventually, the sky thickens with clouds and he appears in what he calls "Game Society Pimps heaven."
Angry Adam
Waiting for him is Adam Koralik, one of the Game Society Pimps gods. He congratulates Cock for learning how to fly and reminds Cock to complete the main storyline, defeating Goat Nibbler. Cock feverishly interrupts that he has been a hero in other ways. Adam is not having it and orders Cock to just focus on defeating the dragons and ultimately kill Goat Nibbler.
Cock then falls out of the sky, naked, and he lands by the farm on the outskirts of Whiterun. There, Cock sees a werewolf f*cking a cow, chalking it up to as a wild occurrence in nature. Cock moves on and the voice in his head compliments on the underwear he is wearing.
With the Elder Scroll in hand, Cock Nibbler focuses on his goal and goes to do what he is told by his gods; defeat Goat Nibbler. So he heads off to Paarthurnax to learn how to defeat Goat Nibbler. Unlike the Game Society Pimps gods, Paarthurnax does not compliment Cock on his new power and advises he learns teleportation instead.
Paarthurnax tells Cock that in order to learn the power to defeat Goat Nibbler, Cock has to travel through a time wound and learn how the heroes that banished Goat Nibbler in the first place did it. Paarthurnax warns about the power of time warp telling Cock that his toes became really old one time because of this.
Cock steps back into the time wound and opens up his Elder Scroll, which serves as a device to look back into the past. In the scroll, Cock sees three heroes battling and defeating a dragon, not Goat Nibbler but Crunch Nibbler. Crunch Nibbler happens to be an evil servant of Goat Nibbler.
Crunch Nibbler, Goat Nibbler's evil servant
Cock is unimpressed by the epic fight between the three heroes and the dragon. He mentions that it took three people to kill a dragon. Cock is confident that he would be able to kill Goat Nibbler and save Skyrim single-handedly.
After the three heroes kill the dragon, in the vision, past Goat Nibbler appears. The three heroes hold up at first using a power called Dragonrend that forces dragons to stop flying and land. This is what Cock returned back in time for and he takes note of it. However, the fight against Goat Nibbler is not an easy one and one of the warriors is knocked dead by its violent jaws.
The two remaining warriors decide to fallback and use the Elder Scroll to seal the dragon. This would banish Goat Nibbler to a different time, essentially sending the dragon forward to the current time.
Now extremely disappointed in the past heroes, Cock returns to the current time and Goat Nibbler appears in front of him. He decides "Dragonrend" is not worth his time, seeing up-close how effective it was last time it was used, and flies over to the dragon.
Although Cock is able to reach Goat Nibbler mid-air, he causes no damage to the dragon. The voice in his head tries to convince him that the Goat Nibbler's only weakness is "Dragonrend."
Cock settles on trying "Dragonrend" and Goat Nibbler starts to take damage; very little damage that is, since he's battling with no armor and no weapon. He didn't bother to get back his gear after his gods stripped him naked.
While it took a while, Cock is able to get Goat Nibbler's health to zero by punching however Goat Nibbler laughs in his face and leaves him. Cock is shocked and complains to Paarthurnax how this could have happened. Paarthurnax explains that Goat Nibbler has to be killed in multiple places and that Cock would have to find other dragons to learn about Goat Nibbler's whereabouts. Paarthurnax suggests he try going to Dragonsreach, where there is a DBSM chamber big enough for dragons. Paarthurnax reminisces of the good old days when the bards would play is "dick-olo."
BDSM Chamber?
Cock leaves Parthurnax to his nostalgia and rushes to Whiterun to get the Jarl to open up the BDSM chamber. There, Irelith, angrily comments on Cock's naked body, which Cock takes it to mean she's interested, and the Jarl outright denies opening up the chamber.
The Jarl Balgruuf says it would weaken the city. Cock makes a concession. He would get the leaders of Skyrim to agree to a ceasefire during this period and the Jarl happily agrees. Cock could not but think that the Jarl got what he wanted all along.
Cock visits Arngeir, at High Hrothgar, to get him to use his influence and get the leaders of Skyrim to get together for a peace council. Arngeir was at first unwilling to bother in the politics of Skyrim but agreed to host a peace council perhaps after Cock complained how selfish Arngeir and the greybeards were not offering help to him.
Showing *ss
Trivia[]
- Cock Nibbler witnesses S'oggy Balls doing a cow from the episode, After Sex With Aela
Video[]
See also[]
Season 6
Cock Nibbler
S'oggy Balls
| Previous episode: | Next episode: |
| "Flying in Skyrim" | "Giant Chicken Army" |